Le cul entre les deux chaises

An American Spaniard in France or: How I Learned to Make an Ass of Myself in Three Cultures

Great Conjugation: fusionneront

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Here’s a text message I got a while back:

France Télécom et Orange France fusionneront le 30 juin 2013 pour devenir la sociéte ‘Orange’.

I glanced over it and then said, “Hot damn!” because fusionneront is an awesome verb conjugation. How much cooler is it to say fusionneront than “will merge”? Being really poor at number things, I calculate that it’s approximately awesome x infinity to the nth degree. (That sounds about right.)

Another kind of fusion I can get behind.

Train of thought

Merge →→ Mergers and Acquisitions, a thing that people do in movies about corporate finance. [Ed. Also possibly in real life.]

→→ Patrick Bateman was in that division, though he called it Murders and Executions. (What a laugh riot, that guy.)

→→ In French, it’s called Fusion-acquisition, commonly referred to as “fusac.”

→→ FUSAC is a free magazine in Paris whose name stands for France USA Contact. (I think it sounds like a failed US military program.)

→→ You can pick up a copy of FUSAC at Thanksgiving, the American grocery store in the Marais. This is the only place I’ve found regular, original, yellow-boxed Cheerios.

→→ I love Cheerios.


Author: le cul en rows

I'm an American Spaniard, living in France. I like to tell stories.

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